Paul Erdősby which the privileged judge their inferiors
A
Chinua Achebe (chin-oo-ah ah-chay-bae)
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie (chim-ah-man-da nnnn-go-zeh ah-dee-che)
James Agee (a-jee)
Jerzy Andrzejewski (yer-zhay ahn-zhay-ev-ski)
Hannah Arendt (ahr-ent)
Martha Argerich (mar-tah herr-each)
Eugène Atget (oo-zhenne at-zhey)
Augustine of Hippo (aw-gus-tin)
B
Angelo Badalamenti (bottle-ah-menti)
Donald/Frederick Barthelme (barth-uhl-me)
Karl Barth (bart)
Roland Barthes (bart)
Tycho Brahe (Danish pronunciation: too-ghoh brahhh)
Walter Benjamin (ben-yameen)
Bishop Berkeley (barkley)
John Betjeman (betch-uh-mun)
Joseph Beuys (boyz)
Tadeusz Borowski (tah-de-yoosh borr-off-ski)
Burgundy Street, New Orleans (burr-gun-dee)
C
Menzies Campbell (ming-iss)
Thomas Carew (carey)
Vija Celmins (vee-yah tell-midge)
Michael Chabon (shay-bonn)
J.C. Chandor (shann-door)
Cimabue (chee-ma-boo-ee)
Michael Cimino (chee-me-noh)
Emil Cioran (chore-ahn)
Ta-Nehisi Coates (tah-nuh-hah-see)
Alexander/Andrew/Patrick Cockburn (coburn)
Paulo Coelho (~pow-lu kuh-whey.l-you.)1
J.M. Coetzee (~koot-zee-uh)
Robert Campin (com-pin)
William Cowper (cooper)
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (me-high cheek-sent-me-high)
Countee Cullen (cown-tay)
Marie Skłodowska-Curie (skwoh-doaf-ska)
Alfonso/Jonás/Carlo Cuarón (al-fone-so/ho-nas kwah-roan)
D
The Dalles, Oregon (the dolls)
Guy Debord (ghee du-borrh)
Louis De Broglie (duh broy)
Don Juan, Byron character (jew-un)
W.E.B. DuBois (duh-boyz)
Andre Dubus (duh-byoose)
E
Chiwetel Ejiofor (choo-we-tell edge-ee-oh-for)
Paul Erdős (~pal ehr-deush)
Leonhard Euler (oiler)
F
Paul Feyerabend (fire-ah-bent)
Johann Gottlieb Fichte (feesh-tuh)3
Ralph/Ranulph/Sophie/Joseph/Magnus/Martha Fiennes (rayf finezzzzzzzzzzzzz)
Gustave Flaubert (flow-bear)
Michel Foucault (~foo-coh)
G
Alberto Giacometti (Swiss pronunciation: yah-coh-mett-ee)2
André Gide (zheed)
Giotto (jhott-oh)
H.R. Giger (ghee-guh)
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (~goo-tuh/ger-tuh)
Jan Gossaert (~yann ho-sight) aka ‘Mabuse’ (mah-buu-seh)
Philip Gourevitch (guh–ray-vitch)
Alexander Grothendieck (groat-enn-deek)
David Guetta (gay-tah)
H
Vaclav Havel (vott-slav hah-vell)
Michael Haneke (hanukkah)
John Hersey (hearse-ey)
Guy Hocquenghem (ghee ock-en-g’yem)
Houston Street, Manhattan (house-ton)
Joris-Karl Huysmans (zhour-ris karl weese-moss)4
Bohumil Hrabal (boh-who-meal h’rah-ball)
J
Jacques, Shakespeare character (jay-kwiss)
Seu Jorge (~sewe zhawzhe)1
K
Kelis Rogers (kuh-leece)
John Maynard Keynes (kanes)
Krzysztof Kieślowski (krish-toff keesh-loff-skee)
Q’orianka/Xihuaru Kilcher (core-i-an-ka/see-wahr-oo)
Danilo Kiš (dann-eel-oh keesh)
Paul Klee (powell clay)
Zoltán Kodály (zohwl-tahn koh-die)
Sarah Koenig (kay-nig)
Alexandre Kojève (koh-zhevv)
Tadeusz Konwicki (tah-de-yoosh konn-vitz-ski)
Jerzy Kosiński (yer-zhay koh-shin-ski)
Alexandre Koyré (kwah-ray)
Saul Kripke (krip-key)
Thomas Kuhn (coon)
L
Henri Lefebvre (luh-fevv-ruh)
Stanisław Lem (stan-ni-swaf lemm)
Jonathan Lethem (leeth-um)
Jared Leto (let-oh)
Marina Lewycka (leh-vitz-kah)
Peter Lorre (laura)
M
Magdalen College, Oxford (mawd-lin)
Somerset Maugham (mawm)
Czesław Miłosz (chess-waff me-woahsh)
Joan Miró (zhwamn me-roh)
Sławomir Mrożek (swah-voh-meer m’roh-zhek)
Ron Mueck (myoo-ick)
Harry Mulisch (mool-ish)
Edvard Munch (ed-vart moonk)
Robert Musil (moo-zeal/moo-seal)
N
Nacogdoches, Texas (nack-uh-dough-chis)
Natchitoches, Louisiana (nack-uh-tush)
Anaïs Nin (ah-nayh-ees ninn)
Lupita Nyong’o (~nnnnnyong-oh)
O
Adepero Oduye (add-uh-pair-oh oh-doo-yay)
Claes Oldenburg (kloss)
Michael Ondaatje (awn-datch-ee)
David Oyelowo (oh-yell-uh-whoah)
P
Chuck Palahniuk (pahl-uh-nik)
Wolfgang Pauli (pow-lee)
Charles Sanders Peirce (purse)
Samuel Pepys (peeps)
Jodi Picoult (pee-coe)
Max Planck (plonk)
Plotinus (ploh-tine-us)
Anthony Powell (po-uhl)
John Cowper Powys (cooper poh-iss)
Principia Mathematica (prin-kipp-ee-yah)
Marcel Proust (proost)
Joseph Pulitzer (puh-litz-ur)
R
Ayn Rand (well-fare recipient)
Sławomir Rawicz (swah-voh-meer rahh-vitch)
Steve Reich (raish)
Wilhelm Conrad Röntgen/Roentgen (vill-helm rhont-gn)
Theodore Roethke (ret-key)
Mary Ruefle (roo-full)
Ed Ruscha (roo-shay)
S
Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (sanh-eks-oo-pear-ee)
Luc Sante (sahnt)
Jon Scieszka (sheh-shka)
Schlumberger (slumber-zhay)
Bruno Schulz (schooltz)
W.G. Sebald (zay-bald)
Chloë Sevigny (seven-yay)
Choire Sicha (corey seeka)
Charles Simić (Serbian pronunciation: simm-itch, but often called simmick)
Josef Škvorecký (yoh-zeff shkorr-etz-ski)
William Smellie (smiley)
Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn (saul-zhuh-neat-sin)
William Stukeley (stoo-key)
Wisława Szymborska (vee-swa-va shim-bor-ska)
T
Gay Talese (tuh-leeze)
Chief Justice Roger Taney (tawny)
Tchoupitoulas Street, New Orleans (chop-uh-too-luss)
Wayne Thiebaud (tee-bo)
Uwe Timm (ooh-veh)
Colm Tóibín (~column toh–been)
Ernst Troeltsch (trolch)
Tulane University (too-lane)
Ivan Turgenev (yvonne turr-gain-yevv)
George W. S. Trow (like ’grow’)
V
Michel Houllebecq (he doesn’t care)
Joos van Cleve (yohss fon clay-vuh)
Rogier van der Weyden (~ro-kheer fon dur vay-dun)
Vincent van Gogh (Dutch pronunciation: ~finch-ant fan hawh)
Rembrandt van Rijn (remm-brondt fon rain)
Johannes Vermeer (yo-hann-iss furr-meer)
Jones Very (jonas veery)
Vladimir Voinovich (vlah-dee-meer voy-noh-vitch)
W
Ayelet Waldman (eye-yell-it)
Quvenzhané Wallis (kwuh-ven-zhuh-nay)
Robert Walser (valzer)
Evelyn St. John Waugh (eve-linn sin-jun wahh)
Max Weber (veigh-burr)
Simone Weil (zee-moan veigh)
Ludwig Wittgenstein (vitt-genn-shtein)
David Wojnarowicz (woy-nar-oh-vitz)
Pelham Grenville Wodehouse (wood-house)
Joseph Wright of Derby (right of dahr-bee)
Y
William Butler Yeats (yates)
Yerkes Observatory (yer-keys)
Z
Slavoj Žižek (slah-voi zhee-zhek)
Andrzej Żuławski (ahn-drey zhu-wavv-ski)
_________________
1 Portuguese has a much more complicated phonetics than English & so these are especially approximate.
2 Because Giacometti was from the Italian-speaking part of Switzerland a kind of second order snobbishness has descended on the pronunciation of his name. Most people who would judge you pronounce it as you would in Italian (jah-coh-mett-ee) but an inner-inner circle insist on correcting even these people with the Swiss-Italian pronunciation listed here.
3 The pronunciation of the -ch as soft instead of hard, unlike every other instance in German, was contrived after the philosopher’s death to avoid a near-homophony with that language’s word for ‘fuck.’
4 The last syllable doesn’t have an English equivalent but rhymes with the French pronunciation of Jean’s.